Nia turned 7 in October, and ever since she’s been struggling to define herself as a big or little kid. On one hand, she desperately wants to be seen as a big kid doing cool, big kid things. But with that comes greater independence (read: less pampering) and some missed opportunities that would have been dreamy for her 6-year-old self.
Take Halloween, for example, when she had a meltdown because all the big kids were in scary costumes and hers was cute. Or last Saturday when she was adamant that she would not sit on Santa Claus’ lap because that was for babies but then she saw the cool giveaway bags and caved. I’m sure she’d be mortified if she knew I was posting this picture on the blog! Shhhh – don’t say anything…
On a day to day basis we see this play out in various ways. She still wants me to carry her to the kitchen table from bed (which I can barely do anymore) and pour her cereal but she insists she’s mature enough to have a pet. She also gets irritated with good-natured Indians because they say “sure baby” when she asks them something or try to coddle her (Indians LOVE doting on kids). I do feel bad for her because this is obviously causing her a lot of distress but it’s so fascinating to watch it play out. And here’s the crazy part – I never know what’s going to cue the meltdown. She’s become rather irrational as of late and I’m having trouble anticipating what will set her off.
What I’m learning is that it’s tough being 7, straddling the line between big and little kid. I feel for her, I really do. It reminds me of when I was in my early 20’s and I desperately wanted to be seen as mature, wise and independent. But then it also felt so good to still be taken care of by Mom & Dad every once and awhile. Like most parents, I wish I could just solve the dilemma for her, but that would deprive her of the learning that needs to happen at this life juncture. So instead I’ll just walk by her side and keep letting her know that however she is feeling/choosing in that moment is perfectly fine.
PS – She learned her first swear words but pronounced them wrong when she tried to repeat them to us. It was hard not to laugh.
PPS – She has decided that Santa is not real. It’s Jesus that brings the presents. Not sure where she got that one, but ok, we’ll roll with that. :)
