The Big Day Draws Near

The excitement is building folks. I’m just 3 days away from my 8 hour Chaplain volunteer training at the hospital!

Today I met up with a chaplain (paid, not volunteer) and CTI-trained Coach who works at Georgetown University Hospital (thanks for the hook-up Christine). He’s been doing this work for 20 years and was an absolute wealth of information.

The most valuable parts of the conversation for me were in regards to how chaplaincy differs from coaching and the types of situations that each works best in. For example, someone who’s just received word that their loved one died would not be a good candidate for coaching because they’re in survival mode at that point. What they need in that moment to have their basic needs met (think Maslow’s Hierarchy) – getting food or Kleenex perhaps, or sitting with them as they wait for others to show up.

In contrast, someone in the palliative care unit who knows they’re dying may well benefit from some coaching to help them process their thoughts or feelings. The key is to use my intuition to read the situation and then ask permission rather than simply proceeding.

Coaching is my default so self-management will be necessary to keep myself from always going there out of comfort. I need to remember that my clients come to me because they want to do that kind of work and that I can’t just assume that everyone wants to go deep into their thoughts and feelings. They may very well want something else from me – perhaps something as simple as a hug or silent company.

Most importantly, I need to remember that I’m not there to eliminate the pain or find a solution; simply to help ease the suffering. Much of this role is BE-ing work, not DO-ing. The downside of that is that I tend to discount BE-ing because it’s hard to measure the tangible benefits. However, the upside is that I am very good at being a spacious, calming presence.

That’s all I’ve got for now. I’ll write again after the training to give you an update on what I learned. Hang tight!