Good day all – Several of you noticed that my recent blogs have primarily been about Nick & Nia and asked that I give an update on what’s been happening with me. I’m touched to know you care about my goings-on and have decided to oblige your request with an entire post (or two) devoted to M-E. You’re welcome. :) Here goes…
I recently decided that it was time to revisit one of my long-time favorites–choral singing. For those who don’t know, most of my prior singing was done in church choirs (from ages 9 to 17 at St. Jude’s and ages 22 to 25 at St. Bart’s). In general, I’ve struggled to find choral singing overseas, although I did participate in a lovely holiday community choir in Lima 10 years ago….which just so happens to be the last time I did any choral work. Suffice to say, I’m rusty.
DC seemed like the perfect place to capitalize on the availability of choirs, and I quickly identified two local community choir options–one with an ‘easy’ tryout, the other with no auditions. I was feeling optimistic and decided to go for the choir that required an audition since I consider singing in a similar vein as bike riding, meaning, I believe the muscle memory is always there and will come back as soon as one begins using those muscles again. And it’s not like I haven’t been singing; those who’ve spent time with me can attest to the fact that I sing as I’m doing most anything; and especially if I’m in a good mood. The happier I am, the more the music pours out of me. :) So surely it would be fine, right? How hard could it be to get into an informal community choir? Ha!–little did I know…
The Audition Process – Part One
The choir’s website directed me to reach out to the director to coordinate a time for the virtual audition. I did so and learned that my first task was to record myself singing a classical piece of music acapella and send it to her. This posed a small problem since I had no piano to practice, nor any sheet music to work from. I wrote back telling her of my limitations, saying the best I could do was a Broadway tune or a Catholic hymn. She okayed the Catholic hymn.
I wanted to give her something decent, but that would require some creativity on my part. So back I went to the good, old internet, where I found the lyrics and a recording of a church song I knew well. I practiced 10 times with the recording, got my starting pitch from it, and made my recording. It felt very awkward singing into my phone, and consequently required five takes before I was happy with the end product.
The Audition Process – Part Two
I sent the recording off to the director and anxiously awaited her reply. She didn’t keep me waiting long, inviting me for part two of the audition process the next day which would consist of simple vocal scales and sight reading.
I showed up at 10:45 the next morning ready to wow her. I wanted in. Badly. We started with some casual conversation that had me feeling connected to her and confident about my chances of getting in. Then all of a sudden chat time was over and everything took on a much more serious air as the singing portion began. The undertone was clearly “Music is serious business.” Of course this set my nerves off, and when my inner critic chimed in with “I just knew this was a terrible idea.” I went from nervous to downright tense (which is pretty much the opposite of how you want the body feeling while singing). Things went downhill from there. Here’s how it played out:
Her: “Sing Lu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u up the scale with an open vowel.”
Me, repeating back what I thought I’d heard: “Lou-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u”
Her: “Lu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u, not Lou-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u, go right to the u sound. And you need to stop breathing through your nose. You’ll never get enough air to sustain the notes that way. You must breathe through your mouth.”
Me: Trying again, “Lou-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u”.
Her: “You’re not getting it, listen to me do it again. “Lu-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u”. Can you hear the difference?” (the difference was quite miniscule, for the record).
Me: “I think so, but I’m not 100% sure. I’ll try again though. Lou-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u”.
Her: “You’re still not there. And you’re using too much chest voice. There needs to be a clean transition from chest to head voice.”
Me: By this point my head was pounding from trying to remember all the different things I was supposed to be focusing on. Clearly, this was not going well. I wasn’t giving up yet though, so I took some calming breaths, focused with all my might, and I did the exercise five more times until she seemed satisfied.
Her: “Okay, that was your best yet but you need to be able to hear those differences better. Let’s move on.”
Me: “I can definitely work on it. It’s just been a long time since I’ve sung formally.”
Her: “Next up is the sight reading.” she said as she shared a line of music on her screen and gave me the first note. “Go”.
Me: I stumbled through the first half of the line but found my footing on the second half.
Her: “Okay. Well, you got the second half right.”
I was not feeling very optimistic about my chances anymore but held on to the hope that perhaps she was feeling generous today and could see what a hard worker I am. I could see her deliberating. She was about to give her verdict. I held my breath and waited.
The Verdict
Her: “I’m afraid you’re just not ready for this choir yet. You have a nice tone, but you sing in your chest voice too much and that won’t blend with the others when doing classical pieces like we do. You also had some problems with breath support, scales and sight reading. I encourage you to try out again next year after doing a year of voice lessons to better train your voice.”
Me: “I unfortunately won’t be able to audition next year because we’re moving back overseas, but thank you for your time and the feedback.”
When the call ended I sat there in shock. What was that? I thought to myself. I felt the tears well in the corners of my eyes as I picked up the phone to text the outcome to Nick.
Me: Didn’t make it. Voice not trained enough. Supposed to go take voice lessons for a year and then try again next year.
Nick: What the hell? I thought community choirs were chill and welcoming to all?
Me: Not in DC, apparently.
Nick: Well, their loss. For the record, I thought it was stupid that you had to pay money to join too. I think this is for the best. That choir didn’t sound like a good fit.
Me: Yeah, probably not but I just really wanted to sing and now the non-audition choir is full. :(
Stay tuned as I attempt to find another choir to sing in . . .
